fuck it

My current situation is to have no spendable money, lots of obligations that need money, and lots of things to sell that no one wants to buy. It would be outside of my principles to say that my problem is money.

Not only would I not like to say that, but It also isn't. The problem here is things. At some point, I took on as many projects as I could. These projects took a certain amount of start-up cost, and I imagined eating the cost if they didn't work out. I carefully took that risk, thinking that everything could be sold for what I bought it for, or even if less, at least half. The problem is not taking a loss- it's that no one wants to buy it at all.

Of course I could find reasons for that, which are true, like low consumer confidence, the general incompetence of others, and my general appearance being not someone you would trust to buy anything from. But honestly those things are excuses. The reality is much more personal, and it's a lesson I wish I had learned earlier:

Once you have a bunch of shit, you might have it for fucking ever. I would love it at this point If I could just make things like live animals and market-sellable cars dissapear into thin air. Make it so it never happened, costs incurred so far left in memory. But instead, The responsibility to acquire things is the responsibility to safely and intelligently get rid of them. That part isn't so fast, and it's not so fun.

It's the simple life from now on for me. I've had enough of this shit. Diversification is a sinking ship for me. If You like to just live, just drink a few beers, finger bang suzy creamcheese and ask your boss for a raise every 1-20 years, It's for you. If you have a very specific goal, like I do, then forget all your trips into other trades and schemes. It is nothing more than distraction.

I feel like my lifestyle is constipated, just trying to eliminate my false starts to start with one start that won't be false.