hard penises

Are you a handsome, late middle-aged man, with thick, salt & pepper colored hair and a defined jaw line, who has it all, but just can’t seem to rise to the occasion? Has your rigid, youthful vigor turned to flaccid resignation over the years? Do you find it difficult to be intimate with that special woman of yours while she’s screaming “come on! Get hard and stick it in, you old bastard! I’ve only got a few years before I dry up!”? Well, at long last there is a revolutionary solution to these common male problems:

Do something else! You’ve had sex thousands of times. Are you really going to demand more? Read a book! Write memoirs! Eat a cookie! Does your self-esteem still hinge on sexual activity? Get real! You’d think that a man who had lived so long would have something else to do by now. Have a thought!