Self-loathing is seeing things as they are. You’re not special, you’re not worth much, and you need to either kill yourself or become better. Both are fine options, don’t get it twisted. But what is not a fine option is the expectation of self-worth and total satisfaction in one’s own life. In such a state, no one bothers to improve. Their pure contentment leads to mediocrity in every form. Strange then that self-loathing is fought tooth and nail.
It’s human nature to try to make one another feel better. So we allow each other to “vent”. Venting is a temporary fix. It certainly is better than letting negativity build into a spree killing, but not as good as proper self hate. Sometimes people fuck up. Often times they fuck up. Rather than assuring each other to forget about our mistakes and regrets, we ought to be shining a light on them and pouring iodine in the wounds. Otherwise, the hurt person is sent back into the world just as they were before, to repeat themselves and come back later to “vent”.
When is the moment it’s ok to hate oneself, and actually decide to change into a better person? For many people it’s when they walk into a therapist’s office. Now it’s costing money, to hear the same criticism from a stranger that your “friend who’s kind of an asshole” Cobe told you months prior.
Ultimately, feelings come from somewhere. If things don’t feel right, then they aren’t. If you hate yourself, then you’re probably not that great of a person. See the reality of the situation, and properly address it with problem solving. Rather than fighting feelings with feelings, leaving everyone temporarily happy only because they’re too exhausted to feel unpleasant. Or It will come back and get you again.
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