He loved drinking

Why do I love drinking? And why do I do it alone?

The first few drinks is like turning the page. The best time to have them is directly after work, or on a miserable morning. The first very welcome effect is stress relief. At my 3rd drink, I can't even remember where I was feeling aches and pains, and the weight of the world is just gone. This is worth it for it's own sake, but I typically begin trying to work on some creative pursuit.

Does alcohol fuel the creative proccess? You can find tons of talented and untalented people opining on that question, but my answer is "for the working man, yes". After a day of mindless toil, The creative parts of my brain are just not working. I'm irritated, tired, and a little angry. You can't have new and interesting thoughts in that condition. A few drinks puts me in an optimistic condition, which might be all I need.

Ah, but it's not all I need. As I begin getting down to business, the workday and larger worries and troubles creep in. Sometimes they invade my work, or they just cause me to freeze. I certainly can't have that. At this point, I'm at a crossroads between "well, just do the best job you can and if it's not that good, just admit you don't have what it takes right now" or "I'm getting drunk". I pick the latter 90% of the time.

As I drink more(much more), several things could happen. I could fall asleep very early. But dreamless sleep really isn't much of a "consequence" seeing as how some people can't even get to sleep. I could still not do a very good job or call it quits, but at least I'll be really drunk instead of being disappointed in myself. Or, and this is what makes it all worthwhile; I could do a great job, and be really drunk.

It's happened several times. Now did I do a good job because I was drunk? Well, there's no telling. But in my case, the work is different. When I work with all my mental faculties, I'm spiteful, angry, and funny because of that. When I work on something drunk, it's clever, optimistic and good because of that. The work is good because I did it in a condition of feeling ZERO STRESS and maximum joy. That's right, it's not too much of a stretch to suggest work is of a higher quality if it comes out of that mental condition.

So that's why.